What scares you?
I’ve noticed that people have no problem accepting a fear about regular scary things like heights, running out of beer, or clowns (the worst!). Seriously, we drove past a medical clinic that had big red balloons outside. With the movie It still in theaters, that might not be the best idea.
It’s the other big scary thing that worries me more. Day 36 of full time RVing, and I’m still scared. But how do you say that to people? It’s not the ones that will tell you the 8 bazillion things that could go wrong. There will alway be people that rain on your parade.
It’s the people that say “OMG! You are so lucky! How dare you be scared?” Ugh…in my head I’m all effity effing eff eff, because it’s so hard to explain.
- I have daily mini meltdowns about something, anything, everything.
- It’s hard to be in a small space when you’re used to a large space. There is a really big difference between a 3200 sq ft house and a 24’6″ long motorhome.
- Change is hard for me, and I don’t know from one day to the next where I will be.
- What if something happens? I’m a klutz. I could trip on a snake.
- What if my fears mean that I won’t appreciate this enough? This is a big one. It’s one thing to work toward a goal, but achieving that goal? Why is that scaring me?
So much of me says that these fears are irrational and I shouldn’t have them, because I’m lucky to be doing this. I get to do something people dream of doing. Non freaking out me knows that I’m having an amazing experience and everything will be okay.
How do I listen to one me and not the other? How do I find the balance? How do I get local channels on my effity effing Dish receiver without an hour of phone calls?